I can't help but wonder if there is something wrong with me as a Mom. I fell back into my routine at work, plowing through the 600+ e-mails that had accumulated during my 12-week leave, catching up with my team and co-workers, and almost forgetting that I needed to pump. Yes, at the end of the day I was excited to go home and see my Little Man. But I did not spend the whole day pining over him, counting the minutes until I could leave. I went about my day and the time flew by. (Ever notice how that happens when you're busy?)
I'm hoping it's just a reflection of my attempts to be a laid-back, low-drama person. As my Mom reminded me tonight, I know I can be a better Mom to him by working. It will keep me sane and allow us to provide some of the opportunities we want him to have in life. I guess it's just the inevitable pressure of only having one chance to raise him right.
On a lighter note, I got a full evening of snuggles when I got home. Dinner for Giovanni, a lot of screaming while Mom & Dad ate dinner (why does that always happen when we're ready to eat?!), then a little more snuggling while he napped on my chest. Hungry cries around 8:30 spelled dry drawers, pajamas, and a nightcap before he fell asleep in my arms. He was so adorable lying there, that I just held him for another 45 minutes, kissing his sweet little head and thinking of what a blessing he is! Maybe I'll be an okay Mom after all...
|This is how I spent my night|